Suzetter Porter sig

Grocery store ice cream lickers must be crazy or else they never plan to buy any in the future.

Same goes for anyone else that defiles something that someone might buy to eat, drink or otherwise consume.

Has it occurred to them that they might not be the only ones crazy enough to disrespect others by contaminating our stuff? Let this be a warning to all you ice cream lickers, you too could end up buying something that someone else has spoiled.

I can’t help but agree with those social media memes that suggest ice cream lickers and the like should go back to eating Tide pods. Yep, I know that’s not nice, but neither is dirtying our food supply.

I debated even writing this column, as I didn’t want to give more attention to something that smacks of “monkey see, monkey do” mentality. Those that follow the herd aren’t likely to read this and if they do, it probably won’t change their behavior.

But, this is ridiculous folks. And if it doesn’t stop, manufacturers will have no choice but to implement packaging that will cause consumers to have to employ methods akin to trying to break into Fort Knox. Guess who’ll end up paying for that — the ice cream lickers and everyone else, of course.

It will likely also create a new service industry of people with the tools and know how to get into said packaging designed to protect us from the defilers.

Personally, I already have trouble opening some packaging. How many of you need a knife or scissors to open something sealed so tight no mere mortal has a chance of opening it with their bare hands?

The use of sharp objects is an accident waiting to happen, so more business for the emergency rooms and ambulances. The ramifications go on and on and on.

So back to the premise that maybe people who have no respect for others should keep their disrespect to themselves and crunch down a few more Tide pods. Yeah, I know. That’s not nice.

But as Forrest Gump would say, Stupid is as stupid does. I guess we can’t cure stupid, but it would be nice if it would stay away from my box of chocolates. I like mine free of other people’s spit, please.

Please, don’t take that as a suggestion for the next food to target. Thanks.

I wish there were a clear-cut reason why people do what they do. Some say it’s a need for attention. OK. But there’s a ton of ways to get attention that’s not disgusting. Others say its immaturity. DOH. That’s pretty obvious.

So how do we get them to stop? Do we buy them a pint of their favorite whatever, spit in it and then ask them to chow down? If they’re immature or stupid, they’ll probably just dig in and not care that maybe you licked a couple doorknobs earlier that day.

OK. I’m probably getting carried away again. But this insidious public display of deplorable behaviors needs to stop.

Still, it’s probably not really as bad as it seems. Ice cream comes with a seal, as does most all the other products we buy at the store.

But have you seen those videos of restaurant employees dropping a burger and then picking it up from the floor and putting it on a tray for an unsuspecting customer to eat. Oh my gosh. That’s so disgusting. And they actually video it and post it on social media. GROSS!!!

Here I go again, likely blowing things out of proportion. I’m sure that only happens to one out of a million meals.

Nevertheless, I find myself inspecting any food I don’t make myself. Then I tell myself, odds are in my favor that’s it’s fine.

Anyway, I just wanted to say to those that think it’s funny or cool to degrade someone else’s whatever — it could happen to you too dude. So knock it off!

Suzette Porter is TBN’s Pinellas County editor. She can be reached at sporter@tbnweekly.com.